Monday, January 22, 2007

Thats it! No More Animals for me!!!!

Thats IT! I have sworn off animals! NO MORE! They are far to stressful, expensive and everything is far too emotional when it comes to looking after your own animals! Poor Leo has been through the wars since Kinta has come on the scene. Just after christmas he came down with a mild case of kennel cough. Last week Leo has had really red, sore eyes - mild case of conjunctivitis from all the dirt and smoke.... gotta love bushfires and dry weather! Was giving him a groom yesterday and felt something funny on his right foreleg. Thought it was dirt, but upon closer inspection found out that it was a fish hook wedged in his leg (it had twisted around). I couldn't get it out and coz (obviously) it was hurting when you fiddle with it, we had to take him to the AH emergency vet to remove it..... I have told all of my animals that they were not to get sick on Sundays! Only while the vets are open PLEASE! But obviously he didn't listen. Everything is fine now, but the poor tyke has to put up with me giving him antibiotics, cleaning the wound and also cleaning his eyes :(. I don't think he loves me anymore! What makes it worse is that since I left him at home on Sat (I thought he would like the time 'alone' and Kinta needs to be out on her own also)... he has been giving me the cold shoulder. I try and pat him and he is non-communicado. I try and razz him up... nothing. When it is just him and me, it is fine, he is happy, chirpy and bubbly.... but not when Kinta is there :(. It is really upsetting me coz he will want to play, but only with food/toys, not with just me. He doesn't come up for cuddles anymore, as much as I try. He is not as goofy at the moment as he used to be. Maybe it is coz i'm home more often now, but I don't know... he just doesn't seem as wiggly. I'm sure i'm over-reacting and it's just a phase - he is happy enough in himself, but he just doesn't seem to want to interact with me..... maybe it is coz Kinta is so much more excitable and bubbly than him that i'm noticing it.... I dunno, but I still want him to be my dog and want to be with me.

So, after my experience at the vet clinic I have sworn off animals. It is far too depressing. while I was there for 1.5 hrs or whatever... we had one guy crying in the chair next to us. My heart went out to him. Then he was called into a room to be told his pet had died.... He went beserk, crying, banging walls, yelling at the vet, throwing things (couldn't see, but could hear). I really felt for him. The next people that came in had a cat that was really sick..... that was put down. Then someone came in with their ACD. It was a really old fella who apparently can't hear anymore and they had just moved house. He didn't see the dog, dog didn't hear the car and he accidentally hit it. The poor guy looked so miserable. I think the leg was broken etc. How much trauma can you take in a day! Top it off that when I was seeing all of these pets, it was bringing back memories of my last dog, Rusty. I can still remember the day she died so vividly and this brought back all of those memories. I never want to go through that again. What's worse is that I am so much more attached to Leo & Kinta than I ever was with Rusty. I spend much more time with them and we are so much more bonded to each other (despite Leo's cold treatment!). I still know that Leo wants to be with me all the time and he is just trying to adjust to sharing me. When I try and give him a little bit 'extra' he will always come for pats (he was this morning).... and when I come home from work he still loves to see me and goes nuts :P. But I can't bear the thought of losing any of them; Monty, Leo or Kinta. I don't know what i'll do... I was really quiet with Rusty dying... i'm sure people thought I didn't care.... after the first night, I didn't cry (even then I wasn't crying after we said goodbye etc). I could talk about her... but boy I missed her. Just little things I couldn't do - like go into the backyard. I couldn't cope with going out there and not having a dog to greet me. I'll be a wreck when the time comes to say goodbye to my current dogs...... going to the emergency clinic really brought it home for me.... having said that, life is much worse without pets at all :)

On a lighter note, I stayed up until 6am Saturday Night/Morning, watching 1/2 the season of Gilmore Girls ssn 5 - now I have to wait until Feb 7th to get the next season. Kylie had to put up with me jabbering on the phone to her about it... just when I was coming back out of 'fantasy land' and into talking about what we actually did, I had to go and have some lunch :-O. LOL - i'll call ya later to chat and organise a day to do stuff in Jan/Feb mate :). Went to a show in Lang Lang on Sat, Kinta only won her class although this was her first chance at getting the Challenge. She would have had a good chance at it in terms of the other dogs out there, but she just wasn't showing as well as what she did previously.... ah well :). She also got her ears glued Sat arvo, and let me tell you - she just looked a picture with the stocking around her ears (to hold them there until the glue set)... and the look on her face! Should have taken a pic! I doesn't really bother her at all though, which is good.

Sunday, besides going to the vet, I didn't do much, but wasn't overly tired after my marathon the night before either. LOL! Went to CDODC for an instructors meeting etc. Will have to enrol Kinta this Wed, so that I can secure a spot for her. Other than that, that is the story of my life :).

On the book front - I am LOVING Jodi Picoult - she has a really good flow in her writing and can really capture the audience. I'm up the the spicy bits now, but had to stop reading to go to be last night :(. Seriously Recommended book though!!! Oh and i've been posting heaps, so keep reading guys! LOL!


Kylie said...

Yeah right!!! that is all i have to say. You without your animals would be me without blonde hair lol.Just seems wrong now doesnt it hehe.

I know it can be tough to lose an animal but the rewards you get from having them in the first place makes it worth the pain. ;)

I know what you mean when you say that you felt like everyone thought you were mean for not crying when rusty died. I have been like that with death too before ....and i cry at EVERYTHING and ANYTHING!!! Im sure people thought that i didnt care because i would cry when i stuffed up a jump at skating but i didnt cry nearly as much when my grandparents died. Go figure. I think everyone thought my priorities were all screwed up lol. But everyone grieves in their own way and crying over something stupid like a sad scene in a movie is so much different than crying at something substantial. When the pain is that much deeper sometimes you just cant cry. But that is enough psychobabble from me lol

On the subject of Jodi Picoult....i told you she was good didnt i hehe. See i know you too well. We have very similar tastes and i have liked all of her books that i have read so far. They really suck you in so that you really want to know what is going to happen next. Love it

Anyway seems if i dont stop now i will just keep rambling all night (again) so i will go now and i will see you on friday chickadee ;)

Cabrissi Tea said...

I think I feel like this every time I've had to bury one of my babies. (Bria, Cian, Charlotte and Isabella now... geeze, still hard to believe they're not here...) Loosing them is the hardest thing but part of the package that comes with the joy and privledge of sharing our lives with them and somehow it's better than never knowing them at all. I also know what you mean about people thinking you don't care because you're not bawling... everyone grieves in their own way though and some aches are too deep for words.

Hopefully Leo will get over his snit-fit soon, once he and Kinta sort things out between them. I have seen this in Cade and I rather suspect it's a sookie male thing or perhaps a sookie-male-who-was-an-only-kid-for-awhile thing but they do adjust and discover that even if things are different they still have a relationship with you! You may also find he's more wiggly when he's not feeling so yuck from eye goobers and hooks in his leg, poor fella!

(And OPPS, I didn't see those pics in the last post! How gorgeous are they?!?)